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You might have noticed before: Relationships might change as time goes by. Very often they change for the worse. At least that's what you think. Your partner is losing his/her king/queen status down to a normal human being. Or even less. Is that true? Is it your own perception or are there facts supporting your impression? Maybe the relationship is just stable, getting more reliable every month and you just don't realize? But how to judge? How to know? And there might be a point of time where you want to know!

The question is whether you feel the same as in the beginning of the relationship, or even better: How does this relationship change? Easy to know? Our brain tends to believe what fits into the current idea of life. Maybe nowadays you think "well, he's been always like this, I never liked this right from the start". If you read your diary you might find that this exactly was most attractive at that point of time.

So, our current mindset is having a strong influence on what we believe is our past, the reality what we experienced. Sometimes we're just modifying our rating of something what has happened, sometimes we're modifying the event itself by just forgetting parts or remembering not correctly anymore. The "reality" in what we live is a thing in constant movement, adapting quickly to our current mindset. This might be worrying: Our past is not always constant.

But: That doesn't help when it comes to be honest with ourselves - or our partner.

That's the moment where MatingLog makes its point: It is kind of a diary of your relationship. Or it can be. If you put in kind of status records once in a while regarding the quality of your relationship you get a record of how it has been - without the modifying post-event influence of you brain's current view.

The problem: How to measure happiness in a relationship? Fill big question catalogues every second day? Who is doing this?

The MatingLog approach is to measure events. Put things (events) in numbers. Starting now with sexual events. Right, this will be a rough estimation in a scale of 1 (bad) to 5 (great), but that's ok. Record the stuff what is easy to put in numbers: orgasms, duration of the sexual event. Make a statement how you think you're in love. Add some marks regarding your current situation in life, health and happiness in your job. The benefit is you might compare these numbers later. Get some diagrams how things have developped as time goes by. Get some (very basic) idea of a reality how it has been feeling in the moment of happening.

Yeah, put the quality of your sexual events in relation how you felt regarding life balance, job or health. Maybe your partner is still the same - but environment like health and job situation has changed.

What are you going to discover? Maybe some regular, cyclic ups and downs. Correlations with your health and happiness in your job? Some coincidence with the cycle of the moon? Or repeated up and down patterns regarding the season of the year? Maybe the past was better than nowaday's feelings. Or maybe you just got used that things are regular and good?

The approach is far from being perfect. But it might help you to judge the quality and tendency of your current relationship. It can be a tool to remove the current view influence.

Use it just as a plain diary of sexual intercourse or as a record of happiness in love. Find a new view, an new perspective on your love events. Whatever it might be: It might help you to understand your own feelings. And maybe to understand your partner as well.

And things might be interesting: What if your diagrams show similar dents and ups with the curves of thousands of other people? Wouldn't that show that our feelings are not personal but more of a general wave? For this we need some data. This project still is not big enough to help with such results.

Let's start recording our feelings. Let's make a start.